Some years ago I had the incredibly bad judgment to run as a libertarian-leaning Republican for the United States Senate. I had no money, no connections, and no success. To give you a feel for what the experience was like, I’d like to share an incident from the campaign trail that is totally 100% true, … Continue reading You Crazy

Rino: “She’s a charlatan, you see." Dino: “Ah, well, point taken, Rino. However, one must be cognizant of the utter buffoonery of your man. One worries that his skullduggery will win over whatever businesslike judgment he may possess." Rino: “True enough, Dino, though the bold patriot is obligated to inspect the diplomatic judgment of one … Continue reading On the Election

Little Breeches to Lovely Bride, circa 2012. Listen.

"We need to go the hospital today. No rush," my mom said. “Ok,” I answered, still smooshing the sleep from my eyes. I stumbled out of bed and did the normal summer morning things, in no particular hurry. As I ate my breakfast and generally lollygagged around, though, I slowly noticed that the adults were … Continue reading All the Difference

'Cause I'm pan handlin', man handling’, Post holin', high rollin', dust bowlin’ daddy! -Amarillo Highway Jack would belt out the Terry Allen lyrics to Amarillo Highway at random. It was an expression of joy, inspiring fawning admiration from boys yearning to be men. It was also a pre-hipster, pre-millennial, pre-grunge (remember that?) Pied Piper call to … Continue reading What the Men Taught Me

We need to feel important sometimes. I get it. Feeling great about being ME! counts as one of the basic needs on that whole Maslow hierarchy thing that I didn't pay attention to in Psych 101. It was right below Food and just above Scratching Where It Itches. Or the other way 'round. This primordial drive manifests … Continue reading A Long Overdue Attack on the Worship of Motherhood

The professor stood in front of the whiteboard, finger raised in righteous purpose before twenty totally focused students of Ancient Greek. The bearded, unkempt, bespectacled academic had suspended his recitation of the intricacies of noun declensions to hold forth on the "why" of it all. Lower lip trembling as if he were close to tears, Dr. Johnson … Continue reading Opinions

Do you remember the angst of being a teenager? It was a sensory overload kind of experience that is all too easy to forget. There was just too much going on to remember it clearly. You had a mind newly capable of higher reasoning but you had very little knowledge to apply it to. If you're a male, … Continue reading Sex

I might be wrong. About everything. Or anything. I might be wrong about god, foreign policy, and Dave Barry. I might be wrong about me. I've been wrong before. It stinks. I hate it. Not so much because it damages my ego, though there's some of that. I hate being wrong because it usually means … Continue reading I Might Be Wrong

What if it's true? What if  He really rose from the dead? Let me answer that plainly. If Jesus actually rose from the dead, one of two things must be true. The first possibility is that Jesus rose from the dead miraculously, that is, via an event that is contrary to scientific laws. The second is that Jesus' resurrection … Continue reading What If Jesus Rose?